I’m pretty good at… just about everything. With some rare exceptions, just about every new thing I try, I pick up really quickly, and am pretty good at it. Ice skating, volleyball, stand-up comedy, acting, dancing, singing, gymnastics, hockey, rugby, capoeira, woodworking, drawing, painting, sculpture, chemist, surgery, gardening, swimming/diving… Just a whole bunch of random stuff that I’ve had the opportunity to try and… yeah, I’m pretty good at 'em.

I’ve often thought about being the subject of some sort of “Dirty Jobs with Mike Rowe” style show except they challenge me with new tasks/activities to see if they can find something I legitimately suck at.

Nobody goes their whole life without becoming intimately aware of the danger cobra chickens present. Once when I was a teenager, I decided to drive aggressively close to a couple geese while they were strolling around a busy parking lot. The goose took exception, and as I went by, he pecked at my car door, which left a dent and made a VERY loud noise. I was so flabbergasted by the violence contained within this downy devil, that I let my car slow, which was a mistake. The goose took it as a sign of weakness and was now charging at me.

I freak out, not wanting him to damage my car anymore, so I make haste out of the car park, pause for a moment at the stop sign, and turn right onto the road. I look back to the parking lot and what do I see? The goose, full flight, full speed, coming right at my passenger window. Before I can accelerate away, he collides with the passenger side door, leaving a HUGE dent, right next to the little dent he made earlier.

At that point I was doing like 60 in a 35 mph zone just to gtf away from that hellish demon spawn. Methinks perhaps reincarnation is real, and all truly evil people come back as canadian geese.

That’s odd I’ve almost exclusively heard this said about Americans, British, and Chinese tourists. Though I have heard that the French will take you to task if you treat their home like it’s some amusement park, which seems fair?

PDF Files! hadn’t heard that one before, ha!

I remember getting lost there as a child. I was with my family, but that day it started raining cats and dogs, so we went to the closest shop and bought rain ponchos… which evidently is what EVERY family did. We started walking, I got separated for a second, and ended up following this other family around the park for what seemed like hours, but was probably only a few minutes. When I finally caught up with the family, and grabbed the mom-looking ponchos hand, I realized what I had done.

I ended up running from them, and hung around the shop we bought the ponchos from. Luckily, my mom came and found me there. but yo I legit was like “Well, I guess I’ll just live and work at the park now. 😐” Like some Floridian Robinson Crusoe, I felt like I was awash on a strange island, and it was there I would remain after being abandoned. 😅