transcript

A meme saying: “STOP DOING COMPUTER SCIENCE”

  • Computers were supposed to solve math, NOT to be programmed
  • C is a LETTER, not a language
  • Wanna print() something? Write it in a PAPER with a PEN
  • “I’m writing a recursive method with threads to optimize the CPU usage in a 0.02%” THIS IS A NONSENSICAL STATEMENT MADE BY DERANGED PEOPLE

Look at what PROGRAMMERs have been demanding your respect for, after all the led lights we put in their computers: (This is real COMPUTER SCIENCE, done by real COMPUTER SCIENTISTS)

  • FUNNY COLORED LETTERS (with a picture of syntax-highlighted code)
  • 178 COMPILATION ERRORS??? (with a picture of compilation errors
  • A FAKE TEAPOT YOU CAN’T USE (with a picture of a 3d rendered teapot.

IF PROGRAMMING WAS REAL HOW COME NOBODY THOUGH IN DOING while(true{print(money);}

end transcript.

  • humanspiral@lemmy.ca
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    3 months ago

    while 1 print money

    Central banks obfuscate this code a bit, but its all about having the right printer hooked up.

    • CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org
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      3 months ago

      Well, they also use a for loop that whatever group of bureaucrats has to enter a limit into, but basically yes.

  • SlopppyEngineer@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    A client with s very low budget wanted a solution for their filing. We suggested they could get more bang for their bucks with preprinted paper forms, pens and a cabinet than going for software. They were not amused.

  • Gork@lemm.ee
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    3 months ago

    We need more funding for RGB lit components for our programmers since this will make them better programmers

    • ulterno@programming.dev
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      3 months ago

      I am able to get components with unwanted lighting all over the place, but none where lighting is desirable.

      • Didn’t ask for lighting in my fans, got them.
      • Didn’t ask for lighting on my motherboard, got it.
      • Didn’t ask to a blinding light in the power indicator of my monitor, which is brighter than the screen itself. Had to tape it up.
      • Took a real while to find a cabinet without glass/acrylic stuff, because that’s all people sell nowadays.
      • Asked for a good backlit keyboard for a reasonable price. I had to make cutouts out of glow-in-the-dark stickers.
        • RGB everywhere by default, but getting even a single coloured backlight on a keyboard ramps up the price like anything.
      • psud@aussie.zone
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        3 months ago

        Some people use the RGB to indicate system loads by colour, so they can have a visual indicator for when a long process finishes

        • ulterno@programming.dev
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          3 months ago

          That’s a nice way to use it.
          Not for me though, since I prefer audio cues for those things.

          I use the RGB on my gaming mouse to help find it in the dark, but that’s all. Since it’s usually too bright, all 3 RGB values are kept under 10 (out of 255).

          As for the keyboard, I am mostly fine with a single colour LED. RGB would be considered a nice to have for seasonally changing colours. I may find different zone based colours useful, but I need to find a good enough keyboard first.

    • jef@lemm.ee
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      3 months ago

      Don’t understand why it takes people so long anyways, took me like 5 seconds to write it.

      • psud@aussie.zone
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        3 months ago

        Isn’t that what you’re optimising? Trying to reduce runtime by increasing CPU load

        • xmunk@sh.itjust.works
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          3 months ago

          If that’s a genuine non-sarcastic question that isn’t whooshing me then no - there can be other things like memory/disk usage… but if I’m optimizing for CPU I want it to use less overall cycles. It may be that the easiest fix is to throw money at the problem (always a fair option) which would mean getting a beefier/more processor cores to make the performance acceptable but this would usually just shift how cycles are being used to process them faster.

          My joke above was that it’d use more total cycles which actually is generally the case if you’re solving a problem by throwing resources at it (since you’re likely incurring more overhead) but generally when you optimize you want to reduce the total number of cycles by somehow locating and eliminating work that doesn’t need to be done.

          • psud@aussie.zone
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            3 months ago

            It was genuine, in my workplace the only optimisation is for run time

        • ulterno@programming.dev
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          3 months ago

          I once made a multithreaded code for an embedded device.
          Tested it on my development Desktop PC and it used all 4 cores.

          Running it on the target device, all threads ran on the same core because it was too powerful for Linux to feel the need to use multiple cores.

  • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.zip
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    3 months ago

    I mean, the entirety of Steam’s code could maybe be described as an obfuscated version of

    while(true){ print(money); }

  • morrowind@lemmy.ml
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    3 months ago

    Ok but that is actually a nonsensical statement. In no case will using threads and recursion reduce cpu usage